The Complex Morality Of Liking And Sin

The Bible makes it clear that we are called to love others, but does that mean we have to like them? The Greek word for love in the Bible is agapao, which is characterised by self-sacrifice. This type of love is not based on feelings but is a determined act of the will, putting the welfare of others above our own. We are called to love our enemies, do good to those who hate us, bless those who curse us, and pray for those who mistreat us. However, it is natural to dislike someone who has wronged us or someone whose actions we disagree with. So, is it a sin to not like someone?

Jesus disliked people but loved them

Jesus' interactions with others show that he willingly related with all kinds of people, including sinners, tax collectors, Pharisees, Sadducees, Romans, Samaritans, fishermen, women, and children, with no regard for society's view of the respectable. He loved these people and treated them out of that love, but it did not always look pleasant. He spoke harsh words to those who opposed Him, but He did so because it was best for them. He sacrificed His time, His emotional energy, and His wisdom for those who hated Him because He knew it would either bring them to a saving knowledge of Him or turn them away forever.

Jesus demonstrated His love for us in this: "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" (Romans 5:8). We are called to "love your neighbor as yourself" (Luke 10:27) and even to "love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you" (Luke 6:27-28). Jesus told His disciples the night before His crucifixion, "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another" (John 13:34).

Jesus' love for others was not based on feelings but was a determined act of the will, a joyful resolve to put the welfare of others above His own. This type of love is impossible in our own strength, but only by the power of the Holy Spirit can we obey God's commands, including the commandment to love.

Jesus' love for others did not mean that He liked everyone or respected them beyond recognizing that they were made in God's image. He called the Pharisees "hypocrites" and "snakes" in Matthew 23, showing His disdain for their legalism, which harmed others. However, He still loved them and died to save them, demonstrating that it is possible to dislike someone's actions or beliefs while still loving them as a person.

So, while Jesus may have disliked certain people, He still loved them and treated them with respect and compassion, setting an example for us to follow.

Disliking someone can lead to sin

However, disliking someone can lead to sin when we allow that dislike to turn into bitterness and hatred. Holding a grudge is holding hatred in your heart, and God makes it clear that if you won't forgive others, He won't forgive you. The Bible also tells us that we must not dwell on the negative, which only makes matters worse, but instead seek reconciliation and forgive.

Disliking someone can also lead to sin when we allow that dislike to affect our actions towards them. We must not let our dislike for someone affect how we treat them. We must still treat them with love and respect, and not give in to anger or resentment.

Finally, disliking someone can lead to sin when we allow that dislike to influence our thoughts about them. We must be careful not to judge or condemn someone just because we dislike them. We must remember that we are all sinners, and that God loves and forgives us. We must extend that same love and forgiveness to others, even if we dislike them.

Loving someone doesn't mean liking them

The Bible makes it clear that we are called to "love your neighbour as yourself" and even to "love your enemies". This type of love, known as agape love, is not based on feelings but rather on self-sacrifice and a determined act of the will. It involves seeking the best for the other person, regardless of whether we like them or not.

Liking someone, on the other hand, often involves having an emotional connection and feeling affection towards them. It is natural to have people in our lives whom we love but do not necessarily like. This could be due to differences in personalities, behaviours, or actions.

In these situations, it is crucial to separate our feelings of dislike from our actions. We can still choose to love and treat the person with kindness, respect, and compassion, even if we don't particularly like them. This may involve setting boundaries or limiting the amount of time spent with them to protect ourselves.

Ultimately, loving someone doesn't always mean liking them. It's about choosing to put their welfare above our own, even if it's challenging.

God's love is not based on feelings

The Bible tells us that God's will is for us to love other people with a godly love. We are called to "love your neighbour as yourself" and even to "love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you". Jesus told his disciples the night before his crucifixion, "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another".

The Greek word for love in these examples is "agape" or "agapao", which has self-sacrifice as its primary characteristic. This is not a love of brotherly affection or emotional connection. Rather, agape love seeks the best for its object. Sacrificial love is not based on a feeling, but a determined act of the will, a joyful resolve to put the welfare of others above our own.

Jesus said the greatest commandment is to "love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind". God commanded the Israelites to love and serve Him only. The fact that we are commanded to love God shows that it cannot be exclusively based on emotions or feelings; it must be within our power to make the decision to love Him.

Emotion does not create love, but when we choose to love, the emotion comes. We can only truly love God once we know Him. As we grow in knowledge and understanding of who God is, we begin to love the characteristics that define Him, such as wisdom, truth, righteousness, and purity. We also begin to find the opposite of those traits repulsive. Spending time with God causes our hearts to hunger for holiness, and we find satisfaction only in more of Him, because He is the perfect embodiment of everything we long for.

We are called to love our enemies

The concept of loving one's enemies is a central principle in Christian ethics and is derived from the teachings of Jesus, specifically his Sermon on the Mount. In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus says:

> "But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." (Matthew 5:44 NIV)

Jesus is creating a new standard for relationships, one that goes beyond natural inclinations and human tendencies for retaliation. This type of love, or "agape", is not based on feelings but is a determined act of the will, seeking the best for its object. It is a sacrificial love, demonstrated by Jesus himself when he died for us while we were still sinners (Romans 5:8).

Loving our enemies involves showing unconditional love, kindness, compassion, forgiveness, and empathy, irrespective of how they treat us. It is a call to imitate God's character of unconditional and all-encompassing love, extending even to those who have sinned against Him.

Additionally, Jesus instructs us to pray for our enemies, seeking God's blessings and well-being for them. This acknowledges that God's grace extends to all, and it is only through God's grace and the power of the Holy Spirit that we can truly love our enemies.

Loving our enemies is not about liking or approving of their actions. Rather, it is about choosing to treat them with compassion and seeking their highest good, just as Jesus did for us.

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