Obeying Parents: Sin, Religion, And Filial Piety

Disobeying one's parents is a topic that has been widely discussed, especially in religious communities. The fifth commandment states that we should honour our father and mother, which also includes the idea of honouring and submitting to their authority, as long as it does not involve sin. This is because, as children, our parents represent the authority of God to us and act as a stand-in for God. However, as we grow older, we learn to honour our parents in different ways, such as by obeying God even if it goes against our parents' wishes.

Disobeying parents to follow God

The Bible's fifth commandment, "honour your father and mother", is about respecting and submitting to authority. This is because, as children, our parents represent God's authority to us and we learn to obey and submit to God by obeying our parents. However, this does not mean that blind obedience to one's parents is always the right thing to do. If your parents ask you to do something that goes against your morals or conscience, then it is right to disobey them.

As you get older, you will start to make your own decisions that your parents might not agree with. This is a natural part of growing up and becoming your own person. The goal is not mere obedience, but a healthy and respectful relationship with your parents, and a trajectory toward God.

For example, in the case of a 15-year-old boy who took a friend's old phone to use without his parents' permission, it is important to understand the context of the situation. The boy's parents did not want him to have a phone, but he felt that he needed one for his safety and to avoid peer pressure. In this case, the boy's disobedience may be justified if he genuinely feels that his parents' decision goes against his well-being. However, it is important to note that disobedience should be a last resort, and the boy should first try to communicate and work out the issue with his parents.

Ultimately, as Christians, our primary allegiance is to God. If obeying our parents means going against God's will, then we must respectfully disobey them and follow God's commands. This can be a difficult and complex situation, and it is important to seek guidance from trusted sources, such as priests or other religious leaders.

Parental authority

However, this dynamic changes as we grow older. Once we become adults, we are no longer bound to obey our parents in the same way, but we should still honour them and respect their wishes. This can be done by maintaining a close relationship, seeking their advice, and caring for them in their old age. Ultimately, as we mature, we learn to submit directly to God rather than our parents.

It is important to note that parental authority is not absolute. If parents ask their children to do something that goes against their conscience or is morally wrong, children should not obey. In such cases, it may be necessary to disobey parents in order to follow God.

Additionally, as children grow up and become more autonomous, they may disagree with their parents' decisions or beliefs. While it is important to respect parental authority, it is also crucial for individuals to develop their own conclusions about what is reasonable and good. This can lead to a trajectory toward God, even if it means sometimes going against parental wishes.

The fifth commandment

As children, we learn to obey and submit to God by obeying and submitting to our parents. This is because, when we are young, our parents represent the authority of God to us. They stand in for God for a time. However, as we get older, we learn to shift the authority we recognise in our parents to God.

The commandment to honour our parents does not mean blind obedience. As children, we are to obey our parents "in all that they ask of [us] when it is for [our] good or that of the family". But, if a child is convinced in conscience that it would be morally wrong to obey a particular order, he must not do so.

As we grow up, we should continue to respect our parents. We should anticipate their wishes, willingly seek their advice, and accept their just admonitions. This respect is always owed to our parents, even after we have become independent from them.

In conclusion, the fifth commandment is about learning to submit to God's authority by first submitting to our parents' authority. As we mature, we shift our submission from our parents to God, but we continue to honour our parents by respecting them and their wishes.

Obedience and submission

The Bible states that "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 'Honour your father and mother' (this is the first commandment with a promise), 'that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land' (Ephesians 6:1-3 ESV)". This is the fifth commandment, which sits in the middle of the 10 commandments, joining our relationship with God and our relationship with others.

When we are young, our parents represent the authority of God to us. They stand in for God for a time, and we learn to obey and submit to God by obeying and submitting to our parents. This is a critical time for learning how to obey and submit to God, much like training wheels on a bicycle. However, as we get older, we learn to honour our parents in different ways. While obedience towards parents ceases with emancipation, respect is always owed to them.

There may be instances where our parents, or other authorities, ask us to do something that is sinful. In such cases, we must remember that God is the ultimate authority, and we should not sin against the Lord. For example, if parents told their child to hurt someone, it would not be wrong to disobey them.

As we mature, we may find ourselves having to make our own decisions that our parents might not agree with. In such cases, it is important to communicate openly and respectfully with our parents, seeking to understand their wishes and concerns. If we disagree with their wishes, we can respectfully express our differing opinions and, if necessary, make our own choices as adults.

In conclusion, while obedience to parents is crucial during childhood and adolescence, it shifts to a focus on respect and honour as we become emancipated adults. We must always remember that our ultimate obedience and submission are to God, and we should not follow any authority figure into sin.

Honouring parents

However, it is important to note that honouring parents does not mean unconditional obedience. If a parent asks their child to do something that goes against their conscience or is morally wrong, the child should not obey. In such cases, it is more important to obey God than to obey one's parents. Nevertheless, even in situations of disagreement, adult children should strive to honour their parents by communicating respectfully and seeking to understand their perspective.

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